Axel Page 5

  She stopped about a foot in front of him, her penetrating gaze tracing over his face, then down to his chest. He felt completely naked and totally exposed.

  “I’ve never seen the tattoos on your chest,” she murmured.

  He glanced down at the black and grey swirls that mirrored his sleeve, and he didn’t know what to say.

  She reached out and grazed his pectoral with her fingertips. A shiver went down his spine, her soft touch affecting him as a blow with a baseball bat would. The pain in his chest grew into something he didn’t understand. If he’d been hit with a bat, at least he would’ve been able to make sense of the ache—damaged flesh leading to bruising, possibly broken bones— but this … this was something altogether different, and a bit of panic ensued. Maybe he’d worked out too hard, because he certainly felt as if a vise gripped his heart.

  “I see it again,” she whispered, dropping her hand to her side.

  He cleared his throat as so many questions ran through his head. Why had she followed him? What would Hudson do if he caught her out in the middle of the desert with him? And what the fuck was she talking about?

  “What do you see?”

  “I see the glimmer around you. I see your aura. It’s not strong, but it’s got a bit of a purple tinge with a bit of gray.”

  He swallowed past the lump in his throat. Holy shit. He had colors around him when before, she couldn’t see anything?

  As he was about to tell her he didn’t want to know what it meant, she spoke.

  “Purple can signify a lot of things, but based on the furrow between your brow, I’m going to go with confusion. And the gray … respect, wisdom, boredom, decay …”

  He couldn’t hear anything else she said as the blood rushed through his ears. Damn, was he confused, and his soul decayed more with every single day, turning into nothing but black dust.

  As he swayed on his feet certain his knees would give out, he realized fear drove him at this point. Her observations scared the hell out of him, and the only thing he wanted to do was put some space between them, preferably miles.

  “I have to go, Eden. Be careful going back to the silo.”

  He took off, walking on creaky legs.

  Eden could see colors around him. Why now, when she hadn’t been able to see anything for the past eight months? Something within him had been triggered, but he didn’t know what it could be. He’d been content with everyone keeping their distance and with Eden not knowing anything about him except what he decided to tell her.

  His whole body began to tremble, but he didn’t know if it was from fear or something else.

  However, he’d never felt so exposed in his entire life.

  Chapter 10

  That night, Eden paced the kitchen. Everyone had gone to bed, but she couldn’t sleep. A storm raged outside, and she hated storms. They reminded her of horrible things in her past.

  Logically, if she went downstairs to her room, she wouldn’t be able to hear the raging wind or pounding rain. She would be encased in complete silence. However, fear overruled rational thinking at this point. She longed for some company, but she also didn’t want to let on that her fear of the outside elements had her trembling like a leaf. Bad things happened during storms.

  She pulled a mug from the cupboard and filled it with hot water. There had to be fifteen boxes of tea on the shelf, and stared at each trying to figure out what would be best for her at this point. She wanted comfort and to relax, so she ruled out the caffeinated variety. Beverly had once told her that vanilla was excellent for calming nerves, so she grabbed a packet of that.

  As she bobbed the tea bag up and down in the hot water, she recalled one particularly scary night living in the cabin with Benedict.

  It had been about fifty years ago, well before anyone had discovered they lived up at the cabin, and Benedict had gone on an overnight hunting trip, hoping to bag a couple of deer or some elk. Their food supplies had run very low, and an early winter had arrived to the mountains. The storm outside raged on; the wind seeming as if it would tear off the roof while the rain pounded against the side of the house. Lightning and thunder crackled all around, making it feel as though the whole cabin shook.

  Through it all, she huddled in their bed and shivered. When she thought she heard something scraping outside, she sat up, reminding herself that the storm was most likely blowing tree limbs around.

  The noise sounded again, and she brought her knees up to her chest, rested her chin on them, and wrapped her arms around her legs trying to comfort herself. Tears streamed down her face as she wished Benedict had been with her. He always protected her, always looked out for her. However, now, she was on her own.

  She yelped when the scraping sound seemed to come from the front door, and she felt certain that whatever made the noise was not a part of a tree.

  Hurrying off the bed, she grabbed the shotgun and crept toward the door. The lightning and thunder continued their assault, each boom causing her stomach to clench and her knees to weaken.

  The scratching had now turned into something similar to a pounding on the door, but not quite. She furrowed her brow as she tried to decipher the noise, the pulsing elements outside making it difficult to do so.

  When she reached the door, she placed her ear on the panel as she gripped the shotgun.

  A loud roar caused her to step back, almost losing her footing. The hammering continued, and the door began splintering. She backed away to the far wall and held the shotgun out in front of her as tears streamed down her face.

  As the beast continued its assault on the door, the lightning gave her enough illumination to get an idea of what she faced. She saw the gleaming white fangs, the long claws, and the huge black body that outweighed her by at least a hundred pounds.

  If she didn’t do something, she’d die at the hands of the hungry bear.

  It wasn’t the first time she and Benedict had been visited by such a vicious animal, especially when winter came early. The bears weren’t ready for hibernation, but their internal clocks told them the time had come. They needed to feed more in order to make it through their months of slumber.

  In the spring, when they awoke, they always looked for a quick meal to sate their hunger pains.

  However, Benedict had always been the one to deal with them. Now, she’d have to save herself.

  She fired, hitting the bear, which only enraged him further. Loading another bullet with shaky hands, she hated the thought of killing the animal, but if she didn’t, she would be the one to end up dead.

  When she pulled the trigger again, the bear backed away, and she heard its heavy breathing. She loaded the gun once more and aimed for the door. She stood in silence for a few moments, her own breathing seeming almost as loud as the outside storm. As she approached the door, she worried that the bear would lunge at her again, but when she glanced through the broken slats, her attacker had disappeared.

  The rain pelted her face through the damaged wood, and she sank to her knees as she tried to settle her fear and think rationally.

  As she glanced around, she knew her first priority would be to repair the splintering panel. She wouldn’t venture outside to track the animal through the storm, although she should. Bear didn’t sit high on her list of favorite meats, but they could use it.

  The idea of heading out after the animal terrified her even more, so instead, she’d simply pray that it had gone and that Benedict would have a successful hunt.

  Getting to her feet, she went to the kitchen and grabbed a piece of plywood, determined to get the door shored up before the rain flooded their small house.

  She heard the elevator doors open and stood straighter when Axel exited. He hadn’t seen her, but she knew he was troubled. If she couldn’t have seen his gray aura, the furrow between his brows and the way his full lips sat in a tight line would have been the perfect indication. He only wore a pair of sweatpants, his big chest seeming to gleam under the low lighting, and a shiver tore through h
er at the thought of touching it again. Although, this afternoon, he’d practically run from her after she’d done so, but honestly, she didn’t know if he’d fled from her touch, or the fact that she could now see his aura. That had surprised her almost as much as it had seemingly shocked him.

  “Hello, Axel.”

  He startled at the sound of her voice and looked at her. They stared at each other for a beat, and heat warmed her cheeks as she recalled her embarrassment at being caught following him out to the desert. However, she had no regrets. Watching him work with his knives had been like observing live art. He moved with such beauty and grace … almost as a dancer would. It would have brought tears to her eyes if the whole point of the exercise hadn’t been to kill.

  “What are you doing up here?” he asked, his voice gruff.

  “I’m having tea.”

  He brushed by her as he retrieved a glass and turned on the sink tap, filling the glass. “At two-thirty in the morning?”

  She shrugged. “Why are you up?”

  He took a long swallow of the water, then set it down on the counter. “Can’t sleep.”

  She sipped her tea and nodded. “Neither can I.”

  “Why?”

  She glanced over at his handsome face, and it seemed as if he really wanted to know. Taking a deep breath, she dove into her story. When she finished, he simply stared at her.

  “So, logically, I know that I’m safe here in the silo, and there certainly won’t be any bears after me, but my emotions get the best of me during storms, and I dream and think about that night.”

  As Axel listened to her story, his chest began to hurt again and his throat constricted. Eden had fought off a damn bear. There was nothing timid or weak about the female, and he didn’t understand why Hudson and Benedict treated her as such.

  “What did Benedict say?”

  “I never told him.”

  He furrowed his brow. “Why the hell not?”

  She sighed and ran her hand through her hair. “He would have been angry that I didn’t take the bear meat.”

  “What about the door? How did you explain the door?”

  “I said that there were cracks in it that we hadn’t realized and I used the plywood to shore it up.”

  Picking up his cup, he took another long sip of water, and he didn’t understand why the urge to place his fist in Benedict’s face railed through him. Instead of being hailed a strong female, would her brother truly have been upset about the meat? He could have come home to pieces of his sister lying around the cabin and a bear sleeping in their bed.

  Clearing his throat, he asked, “So, the storm outside is giving you nightmares?”

  “Yes.”

  He totally understood that. Hell, he couldn’t remember the last time he’d slept a good, full eight hours without interruption.

  “The past can sometimes come and haunt us in the present,” she concluded.

  They stood in silence for a few moments, then she spoke again. “What about you, Axel? Why can’t you sleep?”

  Did he really want to tell her that his mother and father had sold him into sexual slavery? That he’d endured what seemed like eons of pain, misery, and humiliation? That almost every time he closed his eyes, he relived at least some part of it? That his soul felt like a black pit of the deepest, darkest agony and shit that he could ever have imagined?

  No, he couldn’t, but for some reason, he felt he had to offer up something.

  “I guess I had nightmares, as well,” he said, not meeting her gaze.

  She set down her cup and stepped close to him, worry etched on her face. “I’m so sorry, Axel. Does it happen often?”

  He should tell her no and then walk away, and the words sat on the tip of his tongue.

  She smiled sadly at him, then reached out and touched his arm. “You don’t have to answer that, and you don’t have to lie to me.”

  Right. His damn aura. She saw him, saw past his bullshit, and it scared the living hell out of him.

  The pain in his chest intensified, and he rubbed it with the palm of his hand.

  She squeezed his forearm, her touch feeling as if he’d been struck by lightning—the heat and the burn made him wonder if his skin would melt off. But like any masochist, he didn’t want her to remove her hand.

  “Maybe we can comfort each other.”

  This was too much for him. He had no idea what comforting Eden would even begin to look like, but he’d rather lie down with a sack of rattlesnakes.

  “Why don’t you go see Benedict? Or anyone else? They can take care of you.”

  She lowered her gaze. “I don’t want them to think of me as weak and childlike. I just got my own room, and here I am in the kitchen in the middle of the night because I’m afraid of a storm that I wouldn’t even be able to hear if I were snuggled in my bed. It’s my own internal demons keeping me awake, and it reminds me of the time Killian thought there was a monster in his closet. Of course, there wasn’t, but in his mind, it was very real, just like the fear I feel right now.”

  He opened his mouth to argue, but he had no words. He understood the need to appear strong—he struggled with it almost every day. And the internal demons … all the gods knew he had plenty of those fucking with his mind all the time.

  However, he had no idea how to comfort someone, and a little voice in the back of his head told him to get the hell out of dodge. If Hudson were to walk in right now, it wouldn’t be a very happy scene. In fact, they’d probably come to blows, and Eden would become even more upset.

  “We could just sit on the couch together and watch television.” She looked up at him, her gaze pleading. “I just don’t want to be alone right now.”

  Yes, he should definitely disengage himself from this situation. In fact, he should say something nice and polite and wish her well. Instead, he nodded and followed her into the Great Room.

  She turned on the television, and they watched a very informative commercial about a kitchen item that chopped vegetables within seconds. He wondered why Hudson didn’t buy one of those, but seemed to prefer to do his cutting by hand.

  An hour later, Eden yawned next to him and pulled a blanket around her shoulders. A few moments later, her head rested on his arm, her soft breath caressing his bicep. At first, he cringed at the touch and his body stiffened, but after a few moments, he relaxed. Yeah, this wasn’t so bad. In fact, he kind of liked it.

  “I know you’re uncomfortable sitting with me,” Eden said, her voice laced with sleep. “But thank you, Axel. You’re a kind man.”

  There’d been a lot of words used to describe him in his long life, things like garbage, useless, piece of shit, son of a bitch. Well, he couldn’t argue with the last one, and there had been many, many more insults thrown his way. But no one had ever called him kind.

  It brought a little smile to his lips.

  Chapter 11

  Axel had left Eden on the couch in the very early morning hours. The last thing either of them needed had been someone coming upstairs and catching them together. He pretty much stood off everyone’s radar at this point, and he liked it that way.

  He’d gone for a run, then showered and decided to head into downtown Phoenix. He wanted to visit Foster and would probably also go to the club. The sexual need seemed to be building within him, and he craved the release.

  As he took the elevator to Eden’s floor, his palms began to sweat, and butterflies tickled his stomach. He’d tossed this idea around all morning and decided it was a horrible one. Absolutely the wrong thing to do, but as the panels slid open and he stared at the door leading to Eden’s quarters, he couldn’t turn back.

  If she had company, he had no idea how he would explain his presence, especially when he’d been forbidden from even being in the same room as her. Hell, if he got caught at her door … he’d have to think quickly. Right now, he concentrated on just getting through the next few moments without losing his shit.

  He tapped lightly, and a moment later,
she answered.

  Her eyes widened. “Axel! What are you doing here?”

  As he tried to swallow past the nervous lump in his throat, he took her in, her hair wrapped up in a towel and a huge white robe covering her body. She’d obviously just stepped from the shower. When the smell of her floral shampoo assaulted him, he wanted to bury his face in her hair.

  She seemed pale, her face drawn, like she hadn’t gotten enough sleep. Well, duh. She’d been up most of the night, just like him.

  Finally, his tongue untwisted and he could speak. “I … uh … I’ve got some business in town today, and I wanted to let you know in case you wanted to come.”

  She stared at him, her face going from disbelief to a huge smile. “I would love to. Thank you.”

  “If you get caught, I’ll deny knowing you were in the car.”

  Pursing her lips, she nodded. “Of course. Thank you.”

  He retreated back to the elevator as a few beads of sweat popped up on his brow.

  “Axel?”

  He glanced over his shoulder. “Yeah?”

  “You don’t have to be nervous around me. And, thank you again. What time will you be leaving?”

  Oh, yeah. She couldn’t very well stow away in the car without a time, and that damn aura … he couldn’t hide anything from her.

  “Does one work?”

  “Yes. I’ll try to get to the car before then.”

  He nodded, then stepped into the elevator.

  As the doors shut, he exhaled and leaned against the panel, relief flooding through him, calming his stomach. His muscles relaxed, and he unclenched his fists. He hadn’t realized just how nervous he’d been.

  Chapter 12

  Eden stood at the counter making herself a peanut butter sandwich when Beverly walked in with Olivia.

  “Eden! I was just coming to find you,” Beverly exclaimed. “A bunch of us girls are going to go into Phoenix to see a play and have lunch today and thought you’d want to go.”